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Old 06-19-14   #1
Coley
 
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Default Eating disorders

Has anyone here ever experienced an eating disorder? Anyone recovering or recovered?
I struggled most of my teens and early 20s. My thinking is so so so much healthier now, but I want to try fasting for spiritual purposes but seems there are roadblocks and hang ups from the past and some current imbalances although nothing life-threatening. Can't seem to shake off cravings and will feel physically sick if I don't eat certain types of food within an hour of getting up. I used to not be able to tolerate food til afternoon. That's kinda besides the point I guess. What it is is I'm afraid to test it out and afraid somehow my mind will revert back, patterns will emerge again that were there before.
Anyway, one thought that occurred recently was that I should start with a raw/plant based small meals and sit there and learn some gratitude. Not the negative fears that the eating disorder was centred on. But instead of a full out fast, the omission of food and the fear I might have tied up in this, a focus on life-giving and living foods, nutrition, the earth it grew from, savouring it and being thankful. It would of course be a huge drop in caloric intake and that might still trigger something, or maybe the purpose and focus will prevent that, who knows.
I feel like I've sort of been using somewhat addictive foods as a distraction lately. I feel somehow that it is affecting my ability to focus on other things. It may not be the obsessive restricting and exercise habits of the past but I am not in control of it and it doesn't seem very healthy. So partly a fast off sorts might serve to interrupt this as well.
Anyways. That's my thing. Would be happy to hear others' stories, thoughts this brings up, doesn't have to be a direct response to my situation or anything. I'm happy to hear anything anyone might have on their mind after seeing this. Who knows what might help
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Old 06-19-14   #2
CailinRua

 
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Default Re: Eating disorders

i struggled with an eating disorder for most of my teen years. I would consider myself recovered now as i havent had a relapse in several years. Thats not to say that my eating is entirely healthy 100% of the time, there are still days i forget to eat until late in the day when im stressed out, and i pay for it with headaches and fatigue. I did the raw food diet for 6 months after my son was born and i felt wonderful the whole time, i didnt even need coffee in the morning (if you knew me IRL, you would understand how serious that is haha), and actually i think that focusing on NOURISHING my body instead of changing it helped me out of the cycle of self starvation/overeating/purging. Im no longer on the "raw diet" as it takes a lot of time for food prep, but my eating patterns are forever changed, i grow lots of my own food and still eat a lot of raw and plant based foods because it makes me feel good .

I think if you are concerned a fast could trigger you, then you should respect that and maybe not fast until you feel you are in a more secure place in your recovery? You also mentioned some kind of imbalance, which is another thing to take care of (if possible, im unaware what you mean by imbalance) before attempting a fast, sacrificing your health makes little sense, but you seem very self aware and that is definitely a good thing. I would wait until there wasnt a question about it anymore, that way you would get the desired effect and get the most out of it without hurting your health in the process.
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Old 06-21-14   #3
Coley
 
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Default Re: Eating disorders

Thanks for sharing.... I think growing your own food is brilliant. Putting the energy into nurturing the very plants that will nourish you.... Something lovely about that.

By imbalance, I meant I feel like I am losing the healthy patterns I had for some time. But not ion the same ways as I did when I was in the midst of the eating disorder. More like a dependence on foods that aren't healthy, cravings, etc. And I don't like it.

In any case I think your advice is likely very sound. Making an effort to be back on track and feeling solid before attempting anything that might be triggering.

Again, thanks!
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